Is it possible that as we age, time speeds up? Year after year I set goals and rarely achieve all of them. Is it conceivable that I just set too many expectations in 365.25 days? Sure, I guess. The realization of not dedicating enough time to personal pursuits (goals) generally sets in around November of any given year for me. The “oh crap” moment of not being able to put a checkmark on my self-esteem list, because I ran out of time. When I was in a leadership role, in my other life, I took a course on time management, and one phrase, which has stuck through the years, is, “Time is the only asset we have that, once it passes, you’ll never get it back”. Once we sit and ponder that phrase and substitute the word time with any other commodity, it’s relevance really sets in. Time is fleeting in nature, and the desire to prioritize our passions should be first and foremost. In the 1984 movie, "A Christmas Carol”, Ebenezer Scrooge (George C. Scott) states at the end of the movie, “God forgive me for the time I’ve wasted”. Wow, let that resonate!  When we are in our twenty-something years, time doesn’t move fast enough. Now I am in my sixties and I’m trying to find the snooze button on Father Time’s clock! So here are my goals:

•   Learn to play the piano,

•   Write a fictional book, and

•  Spend quality time with my family.

    “A Symphony of Self-Discovery"

Have you ever had the feeling that deep down inside, you can do something even though you’ve never done it? Here’s a secret, I am not musically inclined. Deep down inside though, I believe that I could play the piano, and be pretty good at it. I’ve always had an interest to play the piano. Maybe this quest started with my daily “air-piano” jams, listening to Elton John in the 1970’s. Here’s a funny story. My stepfather, Tom, was in a band when I was growing up. The band’s name was Liquid Crystal and played top-forty music.  He would go to “gigs” on Friday and Saturday nights and band practice was on Wednesday nights, at our house. Tom was the lead vocalist and played some guitar. Needless to say, one could easily see why I had an affinity for music. In the 11th grade, I tried out for a band. Lead vocalist of course! The band played heavy metal and was named Iron Cross, I believe. The songs I performed for try-outs was Black Sabbath’s “Paranoid” and “Iron Man”. I had other songs ready from Ozzy Osbourne, but the band said I didn’t have to perform anymore after they heard my first rendition of Paranoid. Oh my gosh, did I suck!  Needless to say, my music career came to an abrupt end. I also realized that just because my stepfather was a good vocalist, that didn’t mean his talent magically infiltrated my body while I slept. Now I’m older, much older, and have had a lot of air piano practice, and yes, I still listen to Elton John. I guess my reasons for wanting to play the piano is not only a lifelong dream, and personal expression, but a new challenge. So, I came up with this game plan:

• First: See if there are instructors in my area so I don’t have to travel (remembering that time is an asset I’ll never get back).

• Pricing isn’t a real game breaker for me. However, if I stop drinking coffee at a favorite coffee spot that starts with an “S’ and ends in “ucks”, I can save quite a bit of money. The average person spends $3k a year at this establishment! I’ll stop buying coffee there, drink herbal teas at home (healthier), use the savings for piano lessons and have money left over.

• Second: Set a start date and stick with it. My business really ramps up in April and continues until October. Realistically, I have from now until April to at least get my feet wet. I am going to set a date of February 1st to physically start the lessons. Two months of practicing should be enough time for the instructor to determine if I don’t need to perform any more. LOL!

  "Penning Dreams: My Fiction Novel"

  I have a great idea for a book.  Ha-ha, don’t we all!  According to writer Joseph Epstein, “81 percent of Americans feel that they have a book in them — and should write it.”  That is a lot of folks who aspire to write!  About 15 years ago I found spiritual meaning in my life, and it was a profoundly personal and transformative experience (“God forgive me for the time I’ve wasted”).  I have also had a fascination with all thing’s space/astronomy related.  I guess those two topics are my inspiration to authorship and maybe I can contribute something to the literary world.  A month ago, I started the creative process by developing a story line and creating characters.  My biggest challenge is time, and this target may be a long-term goal.  Maybe I should set a completion date of two years.  What are your thoughts?   Should I set chapter completion times?  I really want to bring this novel to life!

  "Family Ties: Quality Time Matters"

  So aside from the commitments to our business, and the desire to achieve my goals, how do I spend quality time with my family?  First, I think we need to define quality time.  Quality time, in the context of family, refers to meaningful and intentional interactions spent together that foster emotional connections, strengthen relationships, and create lasting memories. It's not just about the quantity of time spent but the depth and significance of the experiences shared.  Reflecting back to my leadership roll, we had an exercise where we were tasked to write five things in the left column of things we valued.  On the right column, we were to write our goals.  These five values and five goals were to be in order of priority.  Long and short of it, your goals should match your values. So, with this value/goal concept in mind, I think there are ten aspects that would ensure success:  

• Presence and Engagement:

  • Quality time involves being fully present and engaged during activities with family members. This means putting away distractions like phones or work-related thoughts and focusing on the shared experience. My wife and I sit 4 feet from each other and send Instagram Meme’s to each other for 3 hours until we go to bed. Then while we are in bed, for the next two hours, she sends me more while I snore.

• Communication:

  • Open and effective communication is crucial for quality time. It's not only about talking but also actively listening, understanding each other's perspectives, and expressing feelings and thoughts. I personally think we are pretty good at this, but practice makes perfect!

• Shared Activities:

  • Engaging in activities together, whether they are recreational, educational, or creative, can create shared memories and strengthen bonds. These activities could include playing games, cooking together, going for walks, or pursuing common hobbies. Going back to the piano goal, Rachel and I actually signed up to take an online “Music Theory” course together.

• Celebrating Milestones:

  • Being present for important life events, celebrations, and milestones is a significant aspect of quality time. Whether it's birthdays, achievements, or special occasions, sharing these moments reinforces family connections. Remember to take photos and print them. Our lives revolve around our phones. Everything we do in life is stored or revolves around our phones. Print the pictures and put them in a frame or better yet, upload the photos to a digital frame. Our family has one in each of our houses, and we can almost instantly share our experiences.

• Quality Over Quantity:

  • It's not about the amount of time spent together but the quality of the interactions. A short, focused period of undivided attention can have a more positive impact than an extended period of time with distractions. I have always said, “If you can learn at least one thing a day, you’ve had a successful day”. Show a child or young adult a skill. Not a task or an app, but an actual skill. Teach them how to bake brownies, or sew a patch, or better yet, how to plant seeds!

• Routine Family Time:

  • Establishing regular routines for family time, such as family dinners, movie nights, or weekend outings, helps create a sense of stability and provides opportunities for connection. We “walk the trees”. Ever since we’ve met, Rachel and I walk the trees. It’s our time to be with each other, be one with nature and spend time with our pets. If we can’t do it once a night, we do it once a week. I’m sure it looks pretty silly with 2 humans and six pets walking, what appears to be aimlessly, around the yard.

• Expressing Love and Affection:

  • Demonstrating love and affection through words, gestures, and physical touch is an essential part of quality time. Expressing emotions fosters a sense of security and belonging within the family unit. I plan on getting more happy day presents for my wife. It doesn’t have to be costly or material things. I mean things like picked wildflowers or giving her the first blackberry of the season.

• Support and Encouragement:

  • Quality time involves providing support and encouragement during both joyful and challenging moments. Sharing experiences and facing difficulties together strengthens family bonds. This will prove to be forever difficult. I have lost two sisters in the past few years, and each one of these tragic experiences have left a hole in me. I do know that the passing of my sister’s will not be the last tragedy, but I do know that Rachel will always be with me for support and my faith will always keep me positive.

• Creating Traditions:

  • Establishing family traditions, whether they are related to holidays, vacations, or everyday routines, contributes to a sense of continuity and shared identity. This year we have committed to a family trip in November! No matter how the music lessons go, we are leaving for the beach!

• Adaptability:

  • This is really difficult at times. My side of the family has a lot of broken family scenarios with much drama. My goal: Being adaptable and willing to adjust plans based on the needs and preferences of family members ensures that the time spent together is enjoyable and fulfilling for everyone.

    Quality time is a subjective concept, and it varies from one family to another. It ultimately depends on the unique dynamics, values, and preferences of the individuals involved. The key is to prioritize and cherish the moments spent together, fostering a sense of connection and mutual understanding within the family!

    “In Conclusion”

    Embarking on a journey to achieve personal goals is a powerful commitment to self-growth and fulfillment. As we step into the promising horizon of 2024, my aspirations to learn the piano, write a novel, and prioritize quality family time resonate as guiding stars in the constellation. Each goal represents not only a personal challenge but an opportunity for self-growth, creativity, and the strengthening of familial bonds. As I embrace the promise of the new year, I am reminded that the pursuit of these objectives is not just about the destination but the transformative journey they offer. What are your goals and aspirations? No matter what, I have faith that we will all be successful in our endeavors.

    Hopefully I won’t be writing another blog titled:

    “I couldn’t handle the pressure of playing piano; it was too much treble”.